One thing that I am realizing more and more is that you have to be fearless. The less fear you have, the better quality of life you will have. If you have a lots of fear, traumas and mental limitations, you will become small, timid, repressed, never fully capable of enjoying life.
I am working my best to minimize my fears as much as I can. Still I got a lot of work to do…but however, when you are engaging your fears, then you are really alive… Everything else is just existence…but being courageous, creative, assertive…that is life.
Other day I was crossing street and I didnt do it exactly on a place where it is meant to be crossed but rather I did it few meters in front of it….because it was more practical. I am crossing street and car is coming in my direction.. However, he needs to slow down and stop because he has red light and plus, I have more than enough time to cross street before he comes close to me.. However, this driver wanted to be little provocative, so instead of slowing down, he begin to accelerate… It is red light, so it is obvious that he will have to stop.. He only wanted to have fun and intimidate me… So he is accelerating and I am thinking, you know what, I am not going to hurry up.. And I stop and decided to stay there on the middle of street. So I am standing there and he is accelerating and when he realized that I am not going anywhere, he got on his brakes and horn… And I am just standing there. He stopped like one meter from me… Immediately he started yelling on me:
„You idiot!!! Are you crazy?“
„No, I am not crazy. I knew that you wont hit me. You only wanted to intimidate me.“ – I told him.
„But what if I was not able to stop on time????“ – he is asking me.
„Dont worry, I know what I am doing. My reflexes are fast enough to move if I had to.“ – I am saying to him.
In the meantime, it became green on traffic light and I moved from street.
„You idiot!“ – he is yelling at me.
„You are idiot“ – I am yelling back to him.
I just want to make clear one thing. This is street in my neighborhood.. There is not lot of traffics. And in that moment, there was no one else, so there was no potential danger. I didnt put anyone in dangerous situation. It was calculated risk. I dont want you to get an idea that is ok to act stupid and cause dangerous things to happen because it is not ok.
My point is, dont be fearful and dont be intimidated by people and situations. People will take advantage of you, humiliate you if you dont know how to stand out for yourself. Life will be too hard if you are afraid and you will shrink and you will become smaller and smaller.. And I dont want fear to manipulate me and get best of me.